When you watch grand designs and see some one pregnant, you think “bloody idiot”. I mean who gets knocked up whilst building a house.  I would, (quite loudly) pronounce what complete knobs they were. I mean how the hell can you be pregnant, start building your dream home and then deal with a newborn.

Well I’m that knob!!!

And I can tell you, it’s absolutely cray cray.

The moment I found out I was pregnant, I thought “oh fucking great, I’m going to look like one of them bloody idiots holding a baby and moaning that it’s hard work living in a caravan”.  Well yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing. I’m living in a mobile home whilst we build a house and I’m going to rant about it. A house that should have been built by now but because we have twatty neighbours (that’s a whole other blog post) we are in the midst of it now. We’ve come through the worst. -4 degrees and having no water when you suddenly remember that you haven’t filled the perfect prep machine (that isn’t quite perfect as this is the second one, so far, and she’s 16 weeks old -FML! ) so you have to quickly pop to the shops to get some bottled water and realise you can’t “quickly” do anything anymore because a baby takes roughly 45 -60 mins to get ready. So quickly means making sure they’ve been fed, burped, the changing bag filled up because you’ll need to take that incase, on that 5 minute journey, they shit themselves and then hold their breath, until they go red, because they don’t want to lay in their own excrement.

I then have to trapse (for want of a better word) around a half built house, remembering that the bi-fold doors don’t open from the outside(?) so I have to go around the outside, balancing on scaffolding, with a car seat in tow.

Now taking my 8 stone dog for a walk, with the baby, is a total other feat in itself. I have to get through 2 lots of Harris fencing and then, depending on the weather, or how my back feels on the day, lug both of them outside to the car where I have the buggy. I can’t keep the buggy inside as I don’t have the room and in any event, even if I did, I would have to get it out on uneven ground, using.every ounce of my core…..and if you’ve been pregnant, that disappears. Another little shitbit no one tells you about.

My life is like an episode of Eastenders.

I was organised before. I mean I used to work up London as a PA to the board. I had to be and yet I have only recently got my shit together when it comes to the newest addition.

We are so close to finishing the house and its exciting times. Yet I look around and Daisy has grown up so fast.

I bought her home and I didn’t have a clue. Most mum’s don’t but that’s the misconception; we all think they do.

I couldn’t change a nappy, how many times do you change the nappy?  I didn’t know what to feed her, or how much to feed her. I mean the midwives quite literally leave you to it once you leave the hospital. You get zero support. They “pop” out and off you go.

You’re meant to be a natural and know everything, obviously.

The first day I was at home, I went out. No one told me to be careful and not do too much in case you pop your stitches, or make yourself bleed more.

I didn’t have anyone to help. It was Scott and I just floating along.

Sleep deprivation could be a whole other blog post but I’ll just say this – They use it as a form of torture. Whatever you think you know about babies and sleep, can NEVER EVER EVER prepare you for the sleepless nights. Thankfully she’s going through now but it’s no fun when you’ve had about 3 hours sleep and then the builders come back on site at half 7 in the morning, drilling, sawing, generally just making fucking noise!

Then we have my business that I’ve decided to revamp because helping Entrepreneurs, as much as I love it, wasn’t fitting with me anymore so it’s now helping Women in Business. I may well change this to mum’s in business but when I do, I’ll let you know.

I’ve done fuck all with it since I was about 7 months pregnant, but now I  have the ole fire in the belly so I’m going to get it back off the ground.

I cannot tell you how much I love just sitting here, writing, talking to people about their business visions and where they want to be. I met a woman this week who has been through the ringer, and is so fired up about making it, she won’t fail. She told me that he wasn’t very motivated, this was after she told me she’s a mum of 2, was an accountant, has gone through a really shitty time and is dong a number of courses per her passions. Say what, motivation?!?!

Why am I telling you all this crap?

Life can sometimes be such a crazy ride. It comes along and tests how strong you really are and in most cases, you’ll astound yourself at how amazing you truly are.

So whilst you lot are nice and comfortable in your bloody houses, think of me lugging the baby and dog about, living in chaos, trying to get my business back on track!!!

 Over and out, Jo the Pikey!